I'm Scared...

You know what is scary? Being vulnerable. Being real. 

I’m going to admit something I hate saying: I am scared. I have this massive project that became bigger than anything I could have imagined the second I spoke it out loud. 

Then, I decided to act on it. 

I am working on curating a collaborative gallery event that is about stories of real people and their real, human, messy, funny and inspiring lives. 

Time passed and suddenly, here I am, with 10 days to pull all of this together. 

My original gallery space promised was pulled out from under me, so again, here I am, trying to work out something new in so little time. 

I’m going to be honest and vulnerable for a second here:

 

I’m scared. 

 

I’m scared I don’t have work that is good enough to offer. 

I am scared that I’ll be disappointed in myself and this gallery. 

I’m worried my idea of “quality over quantity” will make everything look sparse. 

I’m scared no one will come. 

I’m scared people will come.  

I’ve been scared that I won’t be able to “pull this off” in the time I have left so I want to push it back. 

I’m scared people will patronize me and say “how lovely” or “good effort” or that they might lie and tell me it’s nice and a great idea and blah blah blah.... 

I don’t like people to lie about things, okay! If this sucks, TELL ME OKAY? 
If you are reading this now, let’s make this promise to each other: I will continue to work on this with reckless abandon if you will give me your honest thoughts after the gallery. Deal? 

I took the time to write out my fears. Things are less scary if you shed some light on them, right? 

So there. I’ve put it all out there: I am not as brave as I want to be
However, I am determined. And you can bet that when I set my mind on what I want, I make it happen.